Is Your Goal to Have the Happiest Life Possible? Don't Forget This...

8/28/2019

"Me and Kurt feel the same, too much pleasure is pain."
-Post Malone

image: https://www.videoblocks.com/video/man-sitting-alone-on-beach-sunset-slow-motion-rhx9lljqis95xkjm

Okay, right off the bat here you might be thinking that happiness is going to the beach all day, drinking margaritas and getting a tan. I mean it can't get better than that right? That's what everyone thinks they want when they retire so why should that not be the definition of happiness?!

Well, let me break that down for you, how happy will that actually make you?

Don't get me wrong, for about a week you actually might be happy sitting on the beach and drinking, likely with your significant other.

But after a week or two it is just going to be normal to do that and no longer are you looking forward to the beach, rather it is just part of your daily routine.

As you go to the beach more and more the return on happiness gets less and less, resulting in you needing to search for other things to make you happy.

Sure, you could go find another pleasurable activity to make yourself happy, yet the same thing is just going to happen.

You will spend your whole life chasing happiness by doing pleasurable activities constantly and wondering why you aren't happy.

Maybe pleasure is not the answer to happiness. Even though it is very easy to just sit at home and watch Netflix, that is a temporary happiness "high" and eventually you are going to have to watch more and more Netflix to get that same return on happiness.

So, if you want to avoid this never ending cycle of trying to find happiness in the wrong places, this is the right place for you.

Even better, you don't have to give up all of your pleasure either, just adjust the focus of your life from purely pleasure to more of what I am here to talk about.

Oh, and by the way, welcome to MMNTM (/mo-men-tum/) the gym for your mind! Glad you stumbled upon this article as it has a principle that has helped me immensely in my own personal happiness and I hope it can do the same for you! Be sure to stop b y for the daily blogs at yourmmntm.com/blog

-Taylor

Now, let's get to it!

Overview

What Everyone Thinks Happiness Is
What if I Told You This Was Wrong?
Hope, Goals and Discipline
Why This is the Answer
Your Life in a Snapshot: With Too Much Pleasure vs. With Discipline

What Everyone Thinks Happiness Is

It is actually easy to see why they think this.

If your view of perceived happiness is laying on the beach, listening to music and getting drunk, you might want to read this whole article a couple of times.

Too many poeple are putting their happiness in the external world from more money to more likes and follows on social media to more clothes.

But, is thaty what really makes you happy?

It would be easy to say yes, because that is what everyone seems to value in society today but if you look at case stuidies across the world of people who have killed themselves after having all the money and clothes they could afford, you would come to the conclusiuon that that is not the case at all.

Happiness, to me at least, is an internal state that can't be derived from external factors, at least in the long run.

Sure, another hundred followers will make you happy for a few hours maybe, but eventually you just won't care that much because whats the difference between 1,000 and 1,100 followers, really not much.

Or, will that Netflix actually make you happy when you have more productive things to be doing? Sure, the temporary happiness might last a night from it but the feeling of having the discipline to get what you need to done, will last much longer.

Especially if you do the hard sh*t on a daily basis.

What if I Told You This Was Wrong?

Oh. Sh*t.

Well, I can't say I am some perfect human being and right away in life I realized that happiness was not just purely pleasure, but I did in fact find that out the hard way after an emotionally stressful j-term in college one winter.

After a long winter of doing nothing but watching Netflix, drinking, going to the gym (pretty pleasurable for me), and essentially doing no real type of work while I was on break from college, I was the most unhappy I have probably ever been.

I just couldn't figure out why because it seemed like I had no real reason to be unhappy with so much free time and pleasure in my life.

That's when I started testing things, I mean I had the time so why not... plus I have always been into building new habits, it was time to slowly start finding some habits that brought me happiness.

After some months of testing, adding habits such as taking walks every day, writing blog posts, hitting the gym even harder, running, taking cold showers and picking back up my reselling hobby for a little side cash, I finally started to put the pieces together on what was and wasn't working for my happiness.

And guess what it was?!

The habits and actions that were contributing the most to my happiness werre actually the ones that were much less pleasurable. They were the things that really took discipline and thought, not the easy stuff at all.

Isn't that crazy, the things that I wanted to do the least were the ones that helped me the most mentally.

image: https://fullsuitcase.com/dolomites-best-hikes/

Hope, Goals and Discipline

The first two make sense, but that last one though, really?

It was the hard days at the gym, waking up early to go on walks, taking the time to put in work on the blog and so much more that were actually contributing the most to my happiness.

Sure it is kind of self explanatory that hope and goals can bring you happiness as they give you a more positive mindset with something to work towards in the future, but you aren't here for those obvious answers... So let's talk about discipline.

You might think that the total opposite is true, the less discipline you have, the more happy you will be because you will not have any responsibility, but that is not the case at all, just read the quote at the beginning of the blog again.

When you lack discipline in your life, you start to feel like sh*t because you really aren't headed towards any goals and you won't be seeing any results without discipline, and you are essentially just letting life happen.

When you have no control of your life, you stay in the same place, never growing, your life becomes very boring because the pursuit of goals is what brings the most happiness, and without discipline it is kind of hard to pursue your goals.

This happens to many people, they have a great idea and set a goal, yet that as far as they get. they just like the idea of having a goal, not the actual work because it is actually hard (weird haha). But, the hard sh*t can lead to the most happiness.

It should be common sense, just think about it, what will bring more happiness: thinking about a goal forever or actually doing the hard work to reach a goal and feel accomplished?

Exactly.

And discipline is the bridge that you need to get from idea to results, there is no execution or results without discipline.

Why This is the Answer

Hmmmm...

Obviously thinking about your goals and your dreams can make you feel good, for a little while at least, and it is a hell of a lot easier to just think about it than actually do the work.

I can assure you that is not what you want though, unless you aren't trying to actually reach your goals, you do you I guess.

Discipline is what leads to your action towards those goals that can actually help you achieve them, and I can assure you that going after your goals is way more beneficial for your happiness than just thinking about them.

Even if you don't reach all of them, just the process alone and the discipline you create helps your happiness significantly as you are proving to yourself what you are capable of and what you can accomplish.

And this applies to discipline in any area of your life, start building it in work, school, relationships, the gym, etc.

Discipline is going to feel like the hardest thing ever at first but just stick with it and it leads to the process of reaching your goals and that process can 10x your happiness alone.

image: https://www.dmarge.com/2018/09/gym-results.html

Your Life in a Snapshot: With Too Much Pleasure vs. With Discipline

Really think about this one in terms of where you want your life to end up.

If you need to put this discipline thing into perspective here, let me play out a few different scenarios for you here.

Let's say you keep on doing what you are doing in college or just out of college right now, just showing up for work or class every day and not really caring or just getting by so you can pay the bills or graduate.

You come home and think about this cool thing you want to work on but end up getting distracted on Netflix or by your friends to go out and drink for the third time this week.

Obviously, it is easier and more enjoyable to go out and drink, so you choose that. The thing is, you choose this same thing every single week and next thing you know, you are graduating with no idea what you are doing, after wasting all that money on school.

Or you are twenty years into your career, still hating it but you have to keep it now because you have to support your family and pay for that one trip to Florida every year.

You never chose to find discipline and while it may have been fun at the time, you are past that stage now and the after effects of that lack of discipline have carried to this next stage in life.

But, if you chose to be disciplined starting today, you could have had the after effects work in your favor.

Instead of partying and watching Netflix all the time, you started doing everything that you thought was hard, on a day to day basis.

Next thing you know you have consistent habits that discipline has built and you are starting to see some more results in your life and waking up every day feeling amazing because you are actually getting things done.

This feeling amazing leads to better mental health and more happiness as you are starting to see the positive in things rather than just laying around and being negative.

Next thing you know you are checking off damn near every one of your goals and more importantly loving the process that it takes to get there.

Sometimes the struggle and discipline are actually much more enjoyable, to an extent, than just sitting around and watching Netflix all day.

It's your life, live how you want, but I am definitely choosing the path less taken: building discipline.

Thanks again for stopping by the blog, a true pleasure every time you guys read and gain some value from it! Keep up with everything on our social media @yourmmntm and join the gym for more daily content.

Guess what? Memberships to this mind gym are free too, just show top on the blog every day!

-Taylor

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